. Chromosomal aberration screening was also very nice. Everything they measured was diagnosed as "no increased risk and no need for additional tests." That's a relief.So now I'm really pregnant. And I do mean REALLY.
Judging by my size and shape alone, I'm about one month ahead compared to my previous pregnancy. I'm at week 14 and I look like I'm at week 18-20. Every time I pass a mirror, I stop in disbelief. I confirm it several times a day: no matter how much I pull in my tummy or adjust my posture, I still look very pregnant. Weight gain is a bit on the high end but it seems to have all gone on the front side.The next phase after denial is again, "what does this change?". Okay, it was easier this time. I'm way less panicked. We already have a crib and baby clothing. We know how to hold a baby and how to change a diaper. Hopefully this baby will be as chill as Siiri was when she was still small. Now Siiri's anything but chill. She can get so excited about a game that she bounces up and down, shrieks like an eagle and giggles maniacally
. I'm always torn whether to let her have her fun or to tell her to tone it down for the sake of the neighbors. Usually the spectacle is too cute to interrupt.Siiri's vocabulary is amazing by the way. She is still very reluctant to form even the simplest sentences but she says all the separate words. When she looks at the night sky through her bedroom window, she sometimes says, "Star give-me" I reply that I can't give it to her, so she re-states my reasonings from earlier conversations, "Hot far-away big". She then takes her toy puppy, holds it upright by the window and points at the train tracks, "Puppy train watch standing. Train give-me. No. Big far-away cold." I do try to form simple sentences when I'm talking with her, just so she can observe how it's done. It seems to be helpful but sometimes it sounds really creepy like that crazy guy from Silence of the Lambs: "She puts the lotion in the basket". I say things like "Siiri is holding a hairbrush. Siiri put the brush on the floor. Siiri picked up a car. Siiri is playing with the car."
It sounds even weirder in real life. I'd use "you are brushing/you are playing" but when Siiri points to herself, asking "this?", the correct answers include Siiri, girl or kid but she rarely accepts "you" as a valid answer. Hence creepy sentences are formed.Back to topic, what does pregnancy change? It really depends on the person. I just do whatever. I have very few rules for myself. First, don't do anything uncomfortable. When Siiri feels too heavy to carry, I put her on the floor. She's already getting used to it. Second, no drugs (typo fixed from "do drugs" to "no drugs"
). No cough medicine, no preventive pain medication, no hard drugs, no flu shots. I don't even take unnecessary natural medication and I even avoid strong herbal teas. One of the greatest tragedies of modern science was when thalidomide was prescribed and recommended as sleeping pills for pregnant women. Over 10 000 babies were born with defects, which is 20-90% of the children whose mothers took thalidomide. Natural malaria medicine quinine also causes birth defects in sufficient doses and is sold as tonic water in supermarkets. It might be impossible to drink a dangerous amount of it but I'd better just avoid because I haven't seen any studies about constant consumption throughout the entire pregnancy. Third, alcohol and tobacco must be greatly reduced. With tobacco it's easy since I don't smoke and normally no one dares to smoke near me because I'll ask for a cigarette just to annoy them.
It's been years since I quit so I wouldn't smoke it even if they offered but it's still worth the effort to motivate them not to tempt me with cigarettes too often. Alcohol is more tricky. It was a planned pregnancy so I limited my alcohol consumption even before I knew I was pregnant. And still I don't see the science behind the no-alcohol rule. Actually, what I meant to say is, this rule is not scientific. It's so unsupported by science that I'd say it's chauvinistic. Light drinking (up to 6 drinks per week, never over 2 drinks in a day) has not been shown to have any adverse effects. This is the conclusion from literature reviews. There might still be a few badly conducted tests which can be taken out of context, otherwise it would be extra stupid why the reviews say, "no adverse side effects, but pregnant women still shouldn't drink any alcohol." Those jerks would probably include fermented sour milk kefir with up to 1% alcohol, a drink that is recommended by Estonian doctors for young babies. I've even read some doctors in England secretly prescribe wine to pregnant women who have a risk of miscarriage - alcohol relaxes the body and has no adverse side effects in small doses. I'm playing it safe enough. I don't worry about alcohol content below 0.5%, I drink as much kefir as I want and if the wine is excellent I'll have half a glass on a special occasion. This is quite in accordance with the ambiguous view presented in one pregnancy study-book that's distributed for free to all pregnant women in Estonia - seems Estonia might not have a strict no-alcohol rule during pregnancy. 
And that's it with the rules. I eat sushi when I feel like it (I'd eat sushi every day if it wasn't so damn expensive
) , I eat salted raw salmon because it just feels right on my tongue, I eat smoked meat or fish when I like it, although I usually don't, I eat eggs with runny yolk because it makes eggs so much better. I just make sure the eggs are very fresh. I eat good quality soft cheese when I want. I don't peel all vegetables and fruits and I often eat uncooked salad. I eat a lot of things that some pregnant women wouldn't. My reason is weighted risk: my chances of getting hit by a car on my way to work are much greater than the chances of getting poisoned by fresh food. Being extra safe just isn't worth it most of the time. I didn't sand down all the corners in our apartment when Siiri was learning to walk and I won't give up sushi just because it would make things less than 0.01% safer. Stress over little things isn't healthy either.So yeah. It's all the same issues as with previous pregnancy. Is alcohol really never safe? How dangerous is sushi really? And so on. For a while I felt so boring and repetitive even to myself. There's nothing original about going through the exact same thoughts twice. After long consideration, I actually felt glad about the repetition because it also means that I'm still the same person as I was before I had a kid. Sure, some of my traits are now enhanced and some are hidden but I'm still me.
