Birth Paranoia

Absolutely everything makes me think I'm gonna give birth ANY MINUTE NOW. There's so many minor signs listed on Internet, so many things to observe. Some of the signs I've noticed in the last couple of days indicate that it will happen in 2 hours to 2 weeks, some indicate that it will happen in 24 hours (alternatively just a coincidence), some indicate that it will happen within a week. There's no contractions yet. There's just a bunch of details that have hinted of a labour in the near future. Now that I know that the baby is "ready", I definitely read too much into all details. Somehow I still don't think that this baby is willing to wait until after due date. It will either be early or right on time.

One time I was just sitting with a group of friends and for a moment my mind started to wander. Suddenly I realized my labour COULD start. Just there and then. My heart skipped a beat or two and I felt myself going pale in my face. SPOOOOKY! But maybe I still have a few weeks...

And how's the baby doing? She's totally enjoying it! The Ultimate Acti-Baby!!! She has been working out non-stop for 3 days already. She never seems to sleep during the day. And she doesn't just wriggle her little toes; she gets in position and pushes her legs as straight as possible. Then she relaxes a moment and repeats. And she does this for HOURS! Then she changes position and chills out for an hour and then does some other kind of exercises for a couple of hours. At night she either sleeps or maybe I'm too busy sleeping to notice her work-out. She's like a little Rambo. I'm just glad she doesn't hit me like Rambo would.

The week is ending and I should mention about my success with not working anymore... Well.. actually I could in stead mention my LACK of success in this area. Monday and Tuesday I spent working. I was either in the lab or going around town due to work reasons. Wednesday and Thursday I did some work on my computer at home. But now I think I'm basically done. There's more stuff I COULD do, but I don't think I will. Especially because I want to chill out before the baby comes and like I said - that could be ANY MOMENT NOW!

My husband calls me "the worst pregnant woman ever" because I fail to slouch on the couch and demand for ice cream in the middle of the night. He also grunted at me for being physically more active than him while just a couple of weeks shy of 9 months pregnant.

I've been trying to buy some simple soft cloth to make a swaddling blanket. Swaddling is a technique for relaxing a tiny infant. It's another word for wrapping a baby in a blanket so that they feel warm and secure. This helps them feel safe and helps them sleep for longer. It's supposed to be a square blanket with 110-120 cm side length. I haven't seen it sold anywhere, so I'll make it myself. I need very light fabric because it's getting quite warm outside. I'm sure my baby would hate to be wrapped in wool in the summer heat. And it has to be very nice and soft against baby's skin. I visited a HUGE fabric store that seemed to have a very wide selection. On closer look it was full of rough ugly non-stretch fabric. I spent over half an hour searching and I just couldn't find anything that would work. I'm gonna have to go back and ask if the salesperson could help me find the right thing.

Actually I was gonna visit the fabric store yesterday and I was all ready to go out when I got sidetracked. I started to arrange books in the bookshelf so that they look nicer. Then I noticed a couple of books that looked dusty, so I got the duster. I lifted out books and arranged them by height and color. I'm not much of a reader myself so that seems like a good enough way to arrange books! That's not entirely as bad as picking a car because it's "cute and red". Book design usually tells a lot about it's content!

I arranged the books and I was pretty happy with myself because it looked a lot nicer this way, but suddenly I realized it could be nesting instinct!!!! Nesting instinct comes a few days before labour! Yesterday I also vacuumed. That in itself isn't anything special. I sometimes do that and we had people coming over. But I suddenly found myself rearranging the couch to get rid of that annoying dust line that the vacuum cleaner never quite reaches. I mean, what's up with that?! It's been there for quite some time and I was always happy to ignore it. And then there was the soap-line in the bath tub that had really been bugging me for a few days already and today I made the bath all shiny. I think I'm in trouble! Not much time left!

...but maybe I just finally have some time to make the home tidy because I'm finally starting my maternity leave. Maybe it's not nesting at all. Who knows...